this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
That's how pantless uber rides happen
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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