I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
