yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize