We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
