I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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