im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
