I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
