I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
After last night, I could never be a politician.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
