wat bout pragnant strippers??
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
