are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
