I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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