Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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