The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Randomize
