Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Randomize
