dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Someone signed my nipple.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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