Midget sex pt 2 tonight
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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