Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I deserve this hangover.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
