He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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