yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
My vagina is very pro this idea
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize