I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
