Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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