I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize