What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
