We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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