and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
