just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Randomize
