i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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