Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize