My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
