doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
