Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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