there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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