she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
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