well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
