Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
