No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
