it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
