He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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