He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
