My brain says no but my pants say off.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
