If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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