I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
