That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
