dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm bleeding and have questions
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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