I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize