His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize