Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
