Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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