Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize