im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
