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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
